I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
