half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
last night I used snow as a chaser
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
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