U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
