I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
