Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I currently don't understand fingers.
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