did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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