Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
