I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize