did you get engaged???
we have officially lost it.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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