That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
