all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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