the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
