hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
