His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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