Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
How does it feel to date your dad?
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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