Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
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