Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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