Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
