I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
