ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
