Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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