guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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