Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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