No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
