I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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