Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
