Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Randomize