i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
