we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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