I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
