My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
