How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
