This girl is more easily done than said...
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
there is puke in my bra ... again
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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