What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
