we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize