With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
