I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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