Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize