WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
