He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
