Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
