Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
