i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
