More tranny stories later!
grandma shit on top of the toilet
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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