butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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