Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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