Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
