Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
