She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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