so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize