yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
